I’m the 11th of 13 children and our sweet mother, who we called “Muh” is no longer with us. But

I think about her everyday. Whether I’m watering my African Violets, she loved flowers, or

preparing a home cooked meal, she was an excellent cook; Muh crosses my mind.

I agree with the great poet, Maya Angleo who said, “I’ve learned that regardless of your

relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they are gone from your life.”

Understanding the delicate balance between a mother’s protective love and a child’s bumpy

journey into adulthood can aid in healing and forgiveness.

Now that I’m a Mom with a 28 year old son, I can testify that, if I had been a parent first, I would

have been a better child. Wouldn’t it be nice if we got the answers to life’s perplexing challenges

first?

In the book I wrote, The Art of Forgiveness - An Expression of Peace, I share how important it is

to forgive ourselves for not knowing what we don’t know and I explain how important it is to

forgive the deceased. Afterall, unforgiveness rests in the cells of our bodies, not the other

person whether they are dead or alive.

As we honor Moms,...Oh my goodness, let us please embrace imperfections. This year, you

might need to write your own Mother’s Day card, because Hallmark does not know your journey

nor what you really need to say to Mom. NEWS FLASH No Mother is perfect. Conflicts,

misunderstandings and mistakes are inevitable in any relationship including Mom.

During a counseling session, tears welled in my client's eyes as she uttered a statement that

resonated with the disbelief of a child: "But my Mother lied to me."

“While I don’t condone lying, I said, “Giving birth doesn't make you tell the truth.” I continued

speaking in hopes of quieting her broken heart, “But for your peace of mind, I’m encouraging

you to accept this flaw in your Mom’s character because she is still your Mom.”

“She is still your Mom.” Many years ago those words were spoken to me after I shared with a

friend that Muh had made some piercing comments to me that caused me to be upset.

“That is still your Mom,” my friend reminded me. Continuing by quoting the Biblical instructions

to “Honor thy father and thy mother, which is the first commandment with promise; so that your

days will be long,” Eph. 6:1-8

My friend continued with clarity, “You see your nose has a responsibility to smell and your ears

have the responsibility to hear. Your nose will never hear and your ears will never smell. And

your responsibility to honor your Mom will never change regardless of what she does that hurts

or offends you. You must honor her.”

For some, Mother’s Day may evoke painful memories or strained relationships. If that is you,

consider embracing forgiveness in 2024. Accept your gift of forgiveness by extending this

precious gift to the special woman in your life. A heart of forgiveness plants seeds of hope and

love today and for generations to come.

Chat W/Pamela4sheriff - Submit questions or comments to www.pamela4sheriff.org You could be featured in our next column. 

Pamela D. Marshall-Koons 

Candidate for Alachua County Sheriff 

Executive Director, At The WELLness Network 

Public Policy/Corporate Strategist 

Author~The Art of Forgiveness - An Expression of Peace